What a strange deal growing old is. What if you just don’t believe it? My mind is way behind the age of my body. I am so confused about reality …I truly believe I am so much younger than I am. I keep getting caught saying and thinking the wrong thing.
Today I told my son I hope I will be able to keep functioning mentally when I get old. His response …when you get old?? Oh yeah I guess I am old …So how am I doing?
Can’t hear about a Jimmy Buffet concert and not think about going and partying in the parking lot and singing every song loud and strong with everyone else during the concert. Thank God there are still a few of the oldies that attend.
Amazingly I have been given the gift of friends and friendships from my way back younger life. That helps me remember and feel so young.
I can’t grow old with my spouse but, I do have the treasure of my sons and the memories we have of earlier family days. They are watching me and making sure all is well… ok I am just going to ignore their concern.
I am continually surprised when those young whipper snappers I meet everywhere are so polite and nice to me like I am old or something.
My trainer checks to see how I am feeling like she thinks I might have issues. I’m fine damn it. Then we work like crazy for an hour and I say …see I can do it. I feel like I am in a battle to prove and show that all is well.
Listening to Doug Kershaw and his fabulous Cajun music. My love of music is deep in my soul and brings me back to the various stages of my life. I remember the first time I saw Doug Kershaw dancing around in a purple suit playing his violin with strings flying off his bow. He was playing in a coffee house in Escondido …where we sat on pillows and drank hot apple cider with a cinnamon stick. I was instantly in love with Cajun music.
OK I get it…The old lady telling about memories of all the fun from a life well lived. That is the definition of old. But, don’t expect to find me in a rocking chair…I refuse!
Yes I will play my music loud and sing even though I’m not good. I think I am at that I don’t care what people think stage…I am still playing and having fun.
I am going to Scotland and party and play and pretend I am young. I am getting up early and staying out late. My definition of feeling good and being happy. I don’t think I will ever agree to old.